What makes goals meaningful?

My birthday falls between Christmas and the new year, so it's a perfect time to reflect and get a jumpstart on resolutions. Some people don't like that word - "resolutions." Perhaps like me, they've set too many that led to disappointment, even objective failure. But goals and the habits that lead to them are too important to dismiss or give up on. Having the courage to chase success even when it may lead to embarrassment or confirmation of self doubt is essential for achieving ambitious goals.

Now, I wonder, how transparent I should be about my own thinking. I already hear an inner voice saying, "Goals don't matter. Achieving anything is ultimately meaningless. Our lives are short, and even the universe has an expiration date. Instead of striving, settle. Instead of being driven, be disengaged. Instead of applying focused efforts, indulge in frivolous entertainment."

At different moments, this voice has been loud and domineering. At others, it's been softer and more sustained, which I find more sinister.

Fortunately, I've found ways to overcome this detractor's persistence. Of course, it would be a lie to say that its nefarious seeds never take root or seize the chance to grow into a cancerous tangle of doubt, despair, and apathy. But three ideas ground me and help me find peace when this voice intrudes.

First, I believe there is an animating and eternal Being at the heart of it all. Whether this Being is a personal god, a trinity of godly manifestations, or another Holy Source is a worthy subject for its own careful examination. My thinking - belief - on this topic continues to evolve, but I'm convinced that there's Something connecting everything.

Second, I focus on the importance of love. Of course, this isn't a novel discovery. Many religions and thinkers have emphasized the incomparable advantages of being more loving. In Mark 12:30-31, Jesus famously answers a question about which commandment is most important by saying, 

"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.' The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no commandment greater than these."

I was reminded of this idea when reading Viktor Frankl's Man's Search for Meaning. Having survived multiple Nazi concentration camps and lost many of his family, Frankl found meaning in love. He writes, "The truth - that love is the ultimate and the highest goal to which man can aspire," leads him to claim that "[t]he salvation of man is through love and in love."

Admittedly, I don't always model these insights about love, but I know them. I'm privileged to have a truly wonderful family, which starts with my compassionate, wise wife and curious, joyful children. I'm also lucky to spend my work life collaborating with people dedicated to improving the lives of others. When I'm too quickly annoyed or angered, I return to this truth: love is the ultimate meaning.

Third, there is only now. I know that events happened in the past and will occur in the future, and a wise person reasonably plans for tomorrow. But in terms of lived experience, there is only the present moment. We are prone to regret when we live in the past, and we are susceptible to anxiety when we dwell on the future. Focusing on the present can free us to take more intentional, effective action.

Which leads back to resolutions and goals, whether at the beginning of a new year, the start of a week, or the top of the hour.

I've found that goals are worthwhile if they increase our sense of meaning by deepening our connection with Being, increasing our capacity to love and be loved, and empowering us to live more freely in the present moment.

To anyone brave enough to set a goal or two for 2024, I wish you all the best.

References
Scripture quotations taken from The Holy Bible, New International Version® NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.
Used with permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Frankl, Viktor E. 1905-1997,, et al. Man's Search for Meaning. Boston, Beacon Press, 2006.